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Tag Archives: Randomness

Seriously

“Uh, surious.”
“Serial?”
“So. So Suriously.”
“Seariowsy?”
“SURIOSSLY.”
“Je-sus Chrost.”
“It’s Serial. Surryossly.”
“That’s so searious.”
“Like, you know?”
“Serious, I know.”
“You do? Searious?”
“Serious, I do. You know?”
“Oh, I know.”
“Searius?”
“Serial.”
“Ser-really-ous?”
“So serial.”
“Serious now. Serealious?”
“Super serealiosity.”
“That is serious.”
“SO surreous. You know?”
“Oh, I know.”
“You do? Sereal?”
“Serial. I do.”
“It’s so serious, right?”
“It’s super searious.”
“Seriously.”
“Seriously.”

 
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Posted by on December 20, 2012 in Randomness

 

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On This Day In History

On this day in history, November 10 of 1998, a totally random person had a perfectly enjoyable conversation with a random stranger on a random bus in a totally random city in a completely random country. How random…

 
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Posted by on November 10, 2011 in Musings

 

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As American As…

That shit’s as American as puking in the kitchen sink
That shit’s as American as kissing your first cousin
That shit’s as American as calling your mother a whore
That shit’s as American as telling your dad to fuck off
That shit’s as American as participating in your own degradation
That shit’s as American as eating until you puke
That shit’s as American as picking your nose while driving
That shit’s as American as pulling my finger
That shit’s as American as having cosmetic surgery to look like famous strangers
That shit’s as American as keeping it in the family
That shit’s as American as publicizing and celebrating gluttony
That shit’s as American as Louis L’Amour
That shit’s as American as conceiving a child in the backseat of Ch’vy
That shit’s as American as doing chocolate cake shots in front of your children at lunch
That shit’s as American as scratching your balls in public
That shit’s as American as driving without any pants on
That shit’s as American as running backwards and naked through a corn field
That shit’s as American as Celine Dion
That shit’s as American as wiping your snot on your shirt sleeve
That shit’s as American as escaping conviction
That shit’s as American as watching a kid stick a fork in an electrical socket
That shit’s as American as America

 
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Posted by on July 21, 2011 in Randomness

 

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The Entire Human Race Considers Suicide

Following the conviction of the first female to commit crimes against humanity during the Rwandan genocide, the entire human race is now considering mass suicide to extinguish the enigmatic and popular species. Said one humanoid, ‘if we can’t even take care of each other, really, then what’s the point? No one is living because they are in love with granite or hockey or gold or whatever. We are in love with people who are in love with those things. And yet, we kill each other or screw each other over at such a rate that renders our existence meaningless. It makes one wonder why we keep this going…’ In an ironic twist, some religious business leaders have been the staunchest opponents to this species-wide suicide.

 
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Posted by on June 27, 2011 in Music

 

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American TV Reality

If you watch American TV long enough, you just may find yourself watching a tall, made-up, “plastic” blonde standing over her dog yelling at it to take a shit already. This is an American TV Reality.

 
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Posted by on June 27, 2011 in Randomness

 

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Stupid Shit of the Day

I saw a woman holding up traffic, attempting to make a blatantly illegal left turn, all the while talking on her cell phone. (She decided not to make the turn after all. As she backed up her right tires went over the curb.)

 
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Posted by on June 19, 2011 in Randomness

 

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Adios Jack!

Well folks, it looks like our friend, the good doctor Jack Kevorkian has died. Poor guy had a blood clot in his 83-year-old heart. Among all the things you could say about the good doc, BBC‘s Steve Kingstone said the most obvious when he noted that “Jack prompted debate.” I should think so. ‘Ol Jack even had the kahones to run for Congress in 2008, a year after doing 8 years of jail time for his charity work. In an ironic twist, the good doc did not use his miraculous mercy machine on himself. Go figure.

Adios Jack!

 
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Posted by on June 4, 2011 in Randomness

 

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